Finally, small groups
I have failed!
This 12-month series of downloadable handouts was meant to offer easy (quick!) access to the basics and essentials of certain church ministries and spiritual disciplines. This latest offering on the subject of Small Groups – runs to just over 6 pages! Undoubtedly a reflection of my own journey and frustrations to see the potential of these groups flourish.
To be honest, I have a love-hate relationship with small groups – based on personal experiences. The value of such groups is often squandered due to ignorance and poor leadership.
First, I deliberately use the title ‘Small Group’. You might call them home groups, house groups, life groups, midweek groups, connection groups… and the list goes on. For me, the significance of these groups, as intentionally and strategically different from congregational life, lies in their size. For the groups to have any lasting value, they must contain no more than 16 people; if you want greater openness for sharing and prayer, then make the groups no larger than 6. Hence the recent history in many churches of establishing faithful and productive prayer triplets and prayer squares. Therefore, when moving to a time of response and prayer ministry, divide your group into 3s and 4s – simple and effective.
Small Groups – why SIX PAGES!!
Poor editing? Perhaps.
Most churches have some form of regular midweek small groups, with a growing need for facilitators, but the need to envision and equip those leaders is often neglected. We assume it’s not rocket science; it’s not the logistics of a Sunday morning meeting: a lounge, a kettle and a welcoming personality – what more is needed?
The reality is that plenty of people struggle with small-group life. This is a result of unclear messaging. An inconsistent vision. Are we here to study Scripture or offer pastoral support? Probably both, but keeping the balance and valuing everyone’s presence is not an easy task. An opportunity for effective discipleship is reduced to little more than a friendship group. All church life is an opportunity for discipleship. Do I need to say, ‘holistic discipleship’? Or ‘intentional discipleship’? Rather like the term Christian, we seem to need a prefix to clarify our meaning: a born-again Christian, a Bible-believing Christian, an evangelical Christian. Unless your focus is purely social, our midweek groups need to be small and discipleship-oriented: inwards, outwards, and upwards. To grow ‘in Christ’, and like the mustard seed becoming a tree of refuge (Matthew 13:32), we begin to bless and support others – envisioned by the living presence of God, which motivates, clarifies, and empowers our ministry.
Small groups run on the reality of mutual edification. Each of us is responsible for building up one another whilst staying humble enough to receive instruction and encouragement from others too. If the dynamic of spiritual transformation is reduced to non-applied biblical information, and the gathered believers assume the role of either a student or a teacher, then the very existence of your small group needs to be re-examined and relaunched more honestly, either as a weekly Bible tutorial or as a Spirit-infused dynamic discipleship hub.
Leaders, lead. They have the ability to set the culture. And culture is spread by language. Your words will set the spiritual temperature. The way you pray will change how others pray. I’ve seen it. At a public citywide gathering, two ministers were called to the front to pray for the upcoming mission. The first offered a fairly stuffy religious prayer. The second allowed his personal passion for the event and his belief in God's supernatural power to shape the language of his prayer. After he prayed, the first minister prayed again. Perhaps he was convicted or just shamed; whatever the motivation, his second attempt was far closer in language and zeal to the second minister’s prayer. Many years later, at the end of another citywide early-morning prayer meeting, I was invited out for breakfast by a total stranger. The stranger later explained that he had made his decision to pursue me after hearing me pray!
Set a clear, spiritual, God-focused agenda; otherwise, your pastoral work will simply be tea and sympathy – and believe me, it will consume your time and energy!
Many aspects of our lives are intentional. Putting together the right ingredients in the right way to make a successful meal. Studying the appropriate topics for three years to gain a university degree. Even driving our cars requires intention to reach the correct destination. Now apply that to your Christian life. Apply it to Scripture narratives. Jesus making the deliberate decision to head toward Jerusalem. Paul’s general desire to spread the Good News, given a specific focus in Acts 16, through the Holy Spirit, to head into Europe. Do the years you’ve spent in church life correspond favourably to your spiritual maturity and Bible confidence? How can we quantify such things? Should we quantify such things – things so spiritual? YES!!
I suggest, for the sake of the Gospel, for the sake of the last, the lost, and the least, for your family, for your community, for your own healing and wholeness – let’s get more intentional. To coin a phrase, make it count!
Your Christian life isn’t a TV soap opera with exaggerated, never-ending dramatic episodes. It ought to be a blockbuster film series, with self-contained stories that end positively and then set you up for the next (long-awaited) adventure.
Intentional discipleship – where your faith is stretched, and your victories bring a greater sense of corporate celebration.
Ask not what your Small Group can do for you, but what you can do… well, something like that, you get the picture.
And now the all-important postscript.
The times they are a-changing. This topic of small groups is set within the context of a church fellowship. Yet alternative small groups are emerging – exciting times, I hope!
Not every small group is a church-based one. Be aware. You may be attending a more independent group, and because of its size, you project onto it the expectations of a church-based small group. You are looking to be fed, cared for, or deliberately pastored and mentored.
I truly believe in this season, God is raising up Isaac-type figures to contend and reopen the ancient wells. These meetings may look like folk choosing to meet together and sing songs for a couple of hours with a few ‘holy thoughts’ thrown in for good measure. But don’t be fooled! As the ancient wells are re-opened, an oasis is nurtured. Sadly and frustratingly, the old structures don’t fit with this new landscape. The old wineskins can’t contain or handle the new spontaneous content. Those consciously or desperately thirsty will know instinctively how to drink. Those with alternative (or traditional) expectations will most probably feel disappointed or even personally ignored. Ironic that in a place of healing some people will choose to nurture pain – such is the life of the wounded believer. I won't do the proof-texting here, but in the Gospels, Jesus likens God’s Words to bread and His life-giving Spirit to drink. So I’ve learnt, if God is choosing to give bread, then eat; or if water, then drink. Don’t be so presumptuous or arrogant to ask for what isn’t on offer, for He knows what is (truly) needed before you ask.
These ‘healing wells’ (my temporary phrase for this present phenomenon) are ‘springing up’ (no pun intended) across the nation – possibly the nations. These are NOT your regular small groups; these are a spiritual oasis for the thirsty, the apostolic, the injured, the glory carriers, for all of God’s people who want the real thing without cultural, or traditional, or religious filters.
A church-based small group, if well facilitated, can have great spiritual value and a lasting missional effect. A reopened ‘well’ can turn a dry and barren land into a flourishing and surprising manifestation of God’s Kingdom – on Earth as it is in Heaven. Amen.
And as with every good gift that comes from our Father, it is not a case of either or but both and. And some!
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